WEll well hellloooo.
Gosh it’s been a week since iv felt inspired to write.
Life has been happening and as you well know. It’s always for us.
It wasn’t until I came up to my room , lit a lime and vanilla candle and the thunder and rain started.
I decided to go through some pictures and get reconnected with my vision.
Next minute here I am typing away ❤️
This post Isn’t going to be for everyone of you, but most likely if your human you will resonate with something in my story about body image.
So stay with me if you feel called to:
If not.. I love you anyway ❤️
I had this photo shoot done about 6 months ago.
By my amazing photographer in NZ.
He had sent me a file with all the raw images, and I remember clicking through hundreds of them with self judgment After self judgment.
and in the end only choosing about 7 that I “APPROVED” OF. And yes this was out of hundreds.
And let me get clear it was not a reflection of his divine art in hos photography.
It was my personal expectations on myself and my body image:
Looking back now. The most significant thing i recall, is I had literally just completed a fitness body comp where I paced third so you would think I would have been content: but no of course not, because I was always so hard on myself to be and look a certain way.
I mean don’t get me wrong I was happy with how far I had come, but when looking at pictures, daym I was still carrying some serious judgement on myself along with huge insecurities.
This particual picture here was most significant, it’s one that I “hated” and deeply unapproved off.
Well because clearly I had a story of comparison in my mind about my legs weren’t slim enough and my booty looked too big and , blah blah blah🙄
Any how over the past 2 months I have been going deeper into my self worth. My self expectations and the unconscious comparison I put on myself.
Holy shooooot I have noticed the “stories” that I default to. Blended with the limitations I put on myself to try to look perfect (well as perfect as I believe i should be).
Here’s the thing though: the energy that it takes when you pick yourself apart, and judge yourself, manifests and multiplies : it bleeds into other areas of your life and generally nothing good will come of it.
Imagine what that energy could be used toward in your life for a more positive purpose!
For me Body image represents how you feel inside, it’s all projection. If you feel unworthy, unloved, unfulfilled and unappreciated. That is the external result you will get because those “feelings” generally lead to destructive behaviours.
But if you take the time to tap into something that allows you to feel self worth, self love: self confidence and self approval.. oh baby that will reflect externally too. and it will not only lift your vibration to a higher and happier frequency.
It will multiply and manifest into an energy that empowers and inspires others.
I know many of you may be thinking “for goodness sake Marissa , what are you going on about”
But hear me clearly:
This isn’t a share about what you see.
It is a share about what i have seen and noticed in myself and how it has impacted my life for over 36 years.
Disliking yourself and your body is so harmful to your life experience.
I wanted to be straight with myself and ask real questions like:
How can you possibly tap into your higher self with so many limitations??
And heres the irony , the one part of my body I was most emabarresed about since a child has been my booty.
I recall every single day getting dressed between the ages of 6 and 10 and looking in the mirror trying to make it look smaller by hiding it under a jumpber that i would wrap around my waste. Because it was so big .
IT STARTED AT AGE 6 🤦🏽♀️ I mean wtf right!
I remember I would go to the beach with friends and wear shorts thinking that would also hide it.
So why did I have this story at such a young age??
At the time I remember most of my friends were tall, skinny and had cute small bottoms. there were no kardashians or J los to make the big booty popular 🤷🏽♀️ 😂 haha
It took control of my life for such a long period and even now if I don’t do a few squats or a hundred deadlifts a week, i freak out!
BUT today sitting here reflecting on all that I am and all that is. I am Finding true self acceptance in my skin. I am freaken falling in love with this picture.
I am ready to embrace all the woman that I am, inside and out (including this big booty hahaha)
My point is, it may not be your booty.
it might be your tummy
it might be under your arms
it might be your ankles
daym it might be your eyebrows.
But theres the thing.
The more you can accept what you have been gifted with, and instead of focusing on comparing to someone else.
You will truly lift the fog and start to feel the beauty that resides in every part of you.
MASSIVE SHOUT OUT TO ALL YOU WHO ARE CHOOSING TO EMBRACE ALL THE PARTS OF YOU THAT YOU SEE AS A FLAW, BUT ARE AWARE INFACT ARE IMPERFECTLY PERFECT!
I love you!
Ps. What’s the one thing right now that you are focusing on with your body that consumes your energy??
Perhaps it’s time to focus on all the things you do love about yourself and see how that elevate the results in your life ❤️
#healthymindset #healthyheart #healthybody