Do you take advice from people who don’t have to live with the result?
April 26, 2017
Unleashing and Unlocking your truth
May 12, 2017
So tell me. What is more important – how others value you or how YOU value you?
YES, Honey I see you.
Every day you wake up.
You roll over and hit the snooze alarm.
You lay there over thinking life.
Your feeling frustrated, tired and alone.
You either start to listen to all that negative self-talk, or you go back to sleep.
By the third of forth time the alarm goes off, you finally sit up.
You Walk into the bathroom and catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.
You pause for a moment.
You feel the weight of your own thoughts drown you.
You might be living alone. Or you might not. It doesn’t matter. You still feel so isolated.
And BOOM, your shoulders slump forward.
Your head drops.
You start to pull on your tummy.
You start to twist front to side sucking everything in.
You lean into the mirror and you start to touch your face.
You hear your thoughts going a million miles.
But they are not healthy positive thoughts
They are negative thoughts of self-loathing.
Your judging every part of what you see in the mirror.
And all of this happens in about 30 seconds.
Before you even shower your state of well-being is low.
You start to then think about how others see you.
What others feel about you.
What others THINK about you.
It becomes so overwhelming.
But know you HAVE to get ready for your day.
So you BURY the feelings you have towards yourself of self-loathing, self-doubt and self-judgement and “carry on”.
You do everything you can to brighten your thoughts.
But the negative ones are still lingering.
You feel shitty. And you do what you can to enhance your appearance.
You dress up.
You put make up on.
You style your hair.
You put your heels on and Maybe a feel good jam on the radio.
You’re feeling a little better.
You get to your job, and you put on a happy face.
No one would know how you really feel.
You’re known to the outside world as one of the most positive, radiant, vibrant and fun people EVER.
But deep down. your heart is achy.
You’re dying to cry.
You’re tired.
You’re stressed out.
You’re in a state of worry.
You hate what you see when you look in the mirror.
And your OVER IT.
Sound kind I’m talking to YOU?
Well here’s the thing if any of this resonates. Yes, I’m talking to you!
And I can almost guarantee this self-loathing and judgement you have on yourself is only a result of you somewhere along your journey, comparing your highest values to someone else’s.
How would I know??
Because honey this was me.
And it lasted for over 28 years of my life.
I was bout 8 when I experienced deep comparison.
I was the only dark skinned girl in my class.
My besties where all tall, fair skinned, blonde and blue eyed.
I remember being liked by most. I had a gentle heart. I was into sports. I was a good student.
But every day I would go home. I would look in the mirror and ask myself why was I not like the other girls. I didn’t actually recognize how deep this trauma affected me until my early 20s when I had a conversation with my mum & we had found a picture of me cuddling our cat Cheeko. I was 10 at that time and in the picture I looked almost skin and bones. BUT I recall so clearly at that time looking in the mirror and seeing a chubby girl.
Isn’t it insane how sometimes what we see is not what is.
and how far back our “patterns” begin.
It has taken years of personal experiences, thousand of hours of self-education & thousands of dollars in my personal development. To learn how to truly value my own beauty and brilliance.
So how do you turn that struggle into your strength?
1. Accepting yourself as you are is the first step.
2. Accepting your reality and being honest with yourself is the next step.
3. Giving yourself permission to be you is the next step
4. And IF there is something you desire to change, then you should go ahead and do it if it’s about your well-being Remember YOUR thoughts become things so choose positive thoughts.
I love you Marissa xx
Ps. You are more than ENOUGH!!!
